Year End Reflections

Year End Reflections

I can't believe the end of the year is upon us. 2017 has been quite a ride. I am sitting in the living room looking out the window at the still night outside. The sky is full of clouds, making the sky seem a dark gray.

A couple of nights ago I looked out the window of the bedroom to find the Big Dipper constellation. It was so beautiful and bright. The sky was so clear and I couldn't believe that I could see it so well given I live in one of the busiest, well lit areas of Barcelona.

Integrating Change

It takes a while to integrate all the sensory inputs in a city this dense. It has definitely taken me a while to adjust to all the activity. I finally integrated some information, like where we live and why the metro line we live near is so busy.

We live between two of the busiest metro hubs, Espanya and Catalunya. This makes our trips during busy times of the day quite fun as most of the metro cars are full.

We also live 2 blocks from Gran Via. It was nice to be able to walk over during the Christmas season because they put up a lot of shops along the main row. One of my favorite perks from this shop area was roasted chestnuts. For a few nights in a row, John and I walked over and enjoyed some roasted chestnuts straight from the fire into our hands.

The Christmas season is not quite over yet, we've got another week to go. The twelve days of Christmas start on Christmas Day here and I've really enjoyed the laid back manner of life here since Christmas Eve.

Physical Feedback

Nick and John are sick. They've been sick for the past couple of days. I am hoping I don't get sick. They seem to have a cold or something. I was on antibiotics a couple of weeks ago after I got a gland abscess.

So the end of the year has brought some physical adjustments to us but we are all still happy and relatively healthy in Spain. There has been a lot to adjust to for sure but we are almost 3 months in. Being here for that long is a big accomplishment. It hasn't always been easy.

Emotional Feedback

I have been homesick a couple of times. And being in a small piso day in and day out can take some getting used to. We haven't always got along, but we've managed to have some open and healing conversations with one another.

My friends have busier lives on a daily basis than I do and it makes it hard to connect with them. It can be lonely at times but I do the best I can to reach out to them and keep them in my life.

I've started some new projects while I have been here and those are going well. These projects have also pushed me to my limits sometimes, too. So I've had some good, old fashioned "cry sessions".

Changing Identity

I've been changing and shifting for about 9 years now. Self growth is all about change. And changing how one lives on a daily basis is one of the biggest growth challenges to be had. To date, I've probably changed the concept of who I am about 6 times. This one is the biggest shifts I've made.

Because our footprint is so small here, it has helped me spend more time with myself and within my relationships with work and my family in different ways. It has been healing, too. I've spent a lot of time clearing out memories and post-processing all the steps it took to get here. One of which was giving up all of our stuff.

Letting Go

We didn't intend to become minimalists but our move here forced us to be smart about what we brought and how we lived. We don't buy much, each of us have a small amount of clothing and a couple of pair of shoes, (I have about 5 pair), and most of our information, books, pictures, etc. are stored on computers.

We live in a furnished piso and don't have to attend to the upkeep of the place outside of cleaning and dusting. All this has brought a couple of our ideas to life. John and I talked about living in a tiny home at some point in our life and the other day we realized this is pretty close to living in one. If you saw our bathroom, you'd know what I am talking about.

We talked about pairing down the items we each had and throughout the past three moves, we've paired down quite a bit of our stuff. This last round led us to having only a small storage unit left in Austin, (that still has too much stuff in it!), and a couple of suitcases we brought to Spain.

It's been quite an accomplishment as we both had very full lives before this move. And with full lives come a lot of furniture and books and tools. I watched a video I made last year as we prepared to move out of the duplex and I saw all my clothes hanging up. I left most of them behind and up until that moment I had forgotten how many of them did not come with me.

Looking Forward

I'm not sure what next year will bring to us or the country or the world, but for now, as I watch the Christmas lights blink across the way, I am feeling grateful.

I look forward to family visits and to seeing Nick play futbol. I also look forward to my new work projects and seeing what new stuff John creates in his work environment.

But most of all, I am happy to say we feel safe in our place and in Barcelona. We have already seen a piece of France and we look forward to seeing more of Europe while we are here.